Воскресенье, 23.07.2017, 18:44:05
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HEALING TRAUMA
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MY STORY

My name is Oliver Popovic and in last twenty and some years I mostly live in Belgrade.

Website you are visiting now is dedicated to investigation, understanding and healing of traumas, and it was created from many year long need and pursuit for healing of my own traumas.

From my early childhood up until I was around 20, I was always and in changeable intensity mentally, emotionally and physically abused by both of my parents – especially my father, which had, as a permanent result, created traumas, negative actions and bad state of health, causing my often sicknesses caused by various illnesses.

Unfortunately, something similar, in much broader scope and with more participants, happened again in the period from 2000-2008, which led to creation of new mental, emotional, and even physical traumas in the sense of urgent surgical intervention.

By profession I am commercial technician, and since there was no possibility for me to find the job in my own field or in some other similar field, in last 20 years I was engaged with many different jobs for making my own existence – all kinds of hard physical jobs, fruit picking, work in car wash, street market, craft works and similar professions.

During the war which was threatening with the destruction of Yugoslavia, as a volunteer I had spent couple of years with few battle units (Yugoslav National Army, Yugoslav Army, Serbian Voluntary Guard) on the terrain and in the battle field.

As a person I am honest, not cunning, I do not lie, do not hate anyone, and I do not wish bad to anyone, I am not violent and for 44 years of my life I

With regard to I’m positive person, during my life I not done harm to anyone… except in next couple of cases:

As a kid, with the rest of my friends, 6-7 times I committed theft stealing my neighbor’s strawberries and cucumbers.

When I was about 10-12, under the influence of my friends, I entered the cinema through the toilet window even though I already had bought the ticket.
As a teenager, I’m stolen pocket book about acupunctury from public library.

Couple of months after arriving to Belgrade, with no job, money and hungry, in the food store I had stolen chocolate bar. The store manager took it away from me, and as a punishment he confiscated my brand new sweatpants from the bag in which I was carrying my own clothes.

Couple of months later, without the job, money and hungry, I decided to rob someone. In city park I made an ambush, and when one guy (bigger and stronger then me) showed up, I attacked him. He started yelling and scared he started running away on one side, and I – also frightened, started running on the opposite side.

After leaving Yugoslav Army in the March of 1995, unable to find the job, I came to the situation (for who knows how many-ith time) of not having money to pay my rent and food and again, to be forced to sleep in the building corridors, starve and feed myself with fruit remains from open food markets. And even with that kind of long life experience I could find in myself an unbelievable quantity of life joy and happiness, which made me ask myself "Are you crazy, everybody around you are lying to each other, they steal and kill, and you are happy, are you trying to play the holy one?. Am I really Good, or I am just a good Actor, someone who from his own cowardice, fear and wish to be accepted by the Neighborhood choose to act like a good fellow in his life” – I asked myself.
In order to prove myself that kindness is the choice of my own free will, and not the consequence of cowardice, I had to – at least for short, check if I could be Bad, and since I had no better ideas, next evening I ran to an waiter while in the garden of the restaurant "Spring” ("Proleće”) waited on the guests, I pulled out of his back pocket his waiter-wallet and I ran away.
My plunder was not even 200 marks.

But, even though already the next year I was faced with exactly the same situation, for next three-four months, I rather choose sleeping in hallways and starvation.

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